Guard: Welcome to Corneria. Fighter: I like swords. Guard: Welcome to Corneria. Fighter:…

Guard: Welcome to Corneria.
Fighter: I like swords.
Guard: Welcome to Corneria.
Fighter: I like swords.
Guard: Welcome to Corneria.
Fighter: I like swords.
Guard: Welcome to Corneria.
Fighter: I like swords.
Guard: Welcome to Corneria.
Fighter: I like swords.
Black Mage: Urge to destroy world rising.

Conversations, Episodes 1-100

Other 8-Bit Theater Quotes

Onion Kid: I’m sorry, mister. I didn’t see you there.
Black Mage: DON’T LOOK AT ME!
Onion Kid: ARGH!
White Mage: (Off in the distance) Well, no good can come of that. - View Quote Details on Onion Kid: I’m sorry, mister. I didn’t see you there.
Black…
Black Mage: (to Fighter) Why do I allow you to breathe? Why?
Fighter: I always thought it was my wit and candor.
Red Mage: Before we set out for some leveling up, we should pool our money to invest in some weapons, armor, items, and spells and then stay at the local inn.
Thief: Good idea, Red Mage. Plus, it’ll give me time to take care of some business.
Black Mage: Just because you face the other way doesn’t mean we can’t still hear you.
Thief: Er… as your leader, I command you all to forget what I just said.
Fighter: Wait, you mean we should forget to forget what you said, or we should forget the part before that which I have already forgotten since it didn’t involve swords and is therefore meaningless?
Thief: (to Black Mage) Why do you allow him to breathe? - View Quote Details on Black Mage: (to Fighter) Why do I allow you to…
Black Mage: You don’t happen to work at the UPS, do you?
White Mage: Uh… no.
Black Mage: ‘Cause I coulda swore I saw you checkin’ out my package! - View Quote Details on Black Mage: You don’t happen to work at the UPS,…
Drizz’l: Let me get this straight.
Garland: Take your time, pal.
Drizz’l: You summoned a Deep One for us.
Garland: Yup!
Drizz’l: And it attacked us.
Garland: You betcha!
Drizz’l: And that was part of the plan somehow?
Garland: The cornerstone of the whole shebang, I’d say.
Drizz’l: And that was supposed to kill the Light Warriors by destroying our boat?
Garland: See how simple this is?
Drizz’l: It’s like you hate life… - View Quote Details on Drizz’l: Let me get this straight.
Garland: Take your time, pal.
Drizz’l:…
D’you ever wonder if clouds see shapes in the ground? Because I wonder about that a lot. - View Quote Details on D’you ever wonder if clouds see shapes in the ground?…
Black Mage:You don’t know the kinds of persecution my people have had to endure for centuries! And all because of the color of our spells!
White Mage: Well maybe if your spells didn’t have purely evil purposes, you wouldn’t of had that problem!
Black Mage: Are you saying that Black Magic and it’s practitioners are inherently evil?
White Mage: Name one positive, non-destructive use for your magic.
Black Mage: Ha! That’s easy. Give me a scenario.
White Mage: OK. An orphanage is on fire. What do you…
Black Mage: Use Fire-3 to torch the building and then pick off any survivors with Bolt-2 set to a wide dispersal.
White Mage: You are a horrible monster.
Black Mage: Stupid kids would never see it comin’ either. Suckers! - View Quote Details on Black Mage:You don’t know the kinds of persecution my people…
No, Black Belt. Why would I be upset that your pathological inability to follow so much as the most obvious of trails turned a simple tailing into the Jungle Crawl of No Escape. - View Quote Details on No, Black Belt. Why would I be upset that your…
Death is but a doorway, time is but a window, I’ll be back. - View Quote Details on Death is but a doorway, time is but a window,…
Oh, man, what a smell in that thing. Horrible. Anyway! You guys ordered an Apocalypse, if I’m right. - View Quote Details on Oh, man, what a smell in that thing. Horrible. Anyway!…
Thief: This can’t be the right place.
Fighter: The little sign above the door said “Von Vampire Residence”.
Black Mage: Oh please. That doesn’t prove anything. It’s only a last name. It’s not like Fighter’s last name is Knight.
Fighter: Yeah, my last name is McWarrior. Duh. (To Black Mage) And your last name is Evilwizardington.
Black Mage: (So much suffering will be visited upon you…) - View Quote Details on Thief: This can’t be the right place.
Fighter: The little sign…