My wife is a light eater. As soon as it’s…

My wife is a light eater. As soon as it’s light, she starts eating.

Unsourced, The wife and marriage

Why don’t Jews drink? It interferes with their suffering. - View Quote Details on Why don’t Jews drink? It interferes with their suffering.
He hit me among my face. - View Quote Details on He hit me among my face.
I like you—I have no taste—but I like you. - View Quote Details on I like you—I have no taste—but I like you.
I looked high and low for you. I didn’t look low enough. - View Quote Details on I looked high and low for you. I didn’t look…
I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up—they have no holidays. - View Quote Details on I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave…
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret. - View Quote Details on The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
You have a ready wit. Let me know when it’s ready. - View Quote Details on You have a ready wit. Let me know when it’s…
My wife is the sweetest, most tolerant, most beautiful woman in the world. This is a paid political announcement. - View Quote Details on My wife is the sweetest, most tolerant, most beautiful woman…
Take my wife—please! - View Quote Details on Take my wife—please!
I asked a Jewish man “Do you know where Michigan Avenue is?” He said “Yes”, and walked away. - View Quote Details on I asked a Jewish man “Do you know where Michigan…