“[...] one’s never alone with a rubber duck.” —Captain of…

“[...] one’s never alone with a rubber duck.” —Captain of the Golgafrinchans

The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, Chapter 32

Other The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy Quotes

Funny, how just when you think life can’t possibly get any worse it suddenly does. - View Quote Details on Funny, how just when you think life can’t possibly get…
And then, one Thursday, nearly two thousand years after one man had been nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be to be nice to people for a change [...]. - View Quote Details on And then, one Thursday, nearly two thousand years after one…
“If there’s anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now.” –Zaphod - View Quote Details on “If there’s anything more important than my ego around, I…
“You may not instantly see why I bring the subject up, but that is because my mind works so phenomenally fast, and I am at a rough estimate thirty billion times more intelligent than you. Let me give you an example. Think of a number, any number.”
“Er, five,” said the mattress.
“Wrong,” said Marvin. “You see?”
The mattress was much impressed by this and realized that it was in the presence of a not unremarkable mind. - View Quote Details on “You may not instantly see why I bring the subject…
One of the things Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about humans was their habit of continually stating and repeating the very obvious, as in It’s a nice day, or You’re very tall, or Oh dear you seem to have fallen down a thirty-foot well, are you all right? At first Ford had formed a theory to account for this strange behavior. If human beings don’t keep exercising their lips, he thought, their mouths probably seize up. After a few months’ consideration and observation he abandoned this theory in favor of a new one. If they don’t keep on exercising their lips, he thought, their brains start working. After a while he abandoned this one as well as being obstructively cynical. - View Quote Details on One of the things Ford Prefect had always found hardest…
Ford: “Life,” he said, “is like a grapefruit.”
Creature: “Er, how so?”
Ford: “Well, it’s sort of orangey-yellow and dimpled on the outside, wet and squidgy in the middle. It’s got pips inside, too. Oh, and some people have half a one for breakfast.” - View Quote Details on Creature: "Er,...">Ford: “Life,” he said, “is like a grapefruit.”
Creature: “Er,…
When you’re cruising down the road in the fast lane and you lazily sail past a few hard driving cars and are feeling pretty pleased with yourself and then accidentally change down from fourth to first instead of third thus making your engine leap out of your bonnet in a rather ugly mess, it tends to throw you off your stride in much the same way that this remark threw Ford Prefect off his. - View Quote Details on When you’re cruising down the road in the fast lane…
It said: ‘The History of every major Galactic Civilization tends to pass through three distinct and recognizable phases, those of Survival, Inquiry and Sophistication, otherwise known as the How, Why and Where phases.
“For instance, the first phase is characterized by the question How can we eat? the second by the question Why do we eat? and the third by the question Where shall we have lunch?” - View Quote Details on It said: ‘The History of every major Galactic Civilization tends…
Space,” it says, “is big. Really big. You just won’t believe how vastly hugely mindbogglingly big it is. I mean you may think it’s a long way down the road to the chemist, but that’s just peanuts to space. - View Quote Details on Space,” it says, “is big. Really big. You just won’t…
For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much - the wheel, New York, wars and so on - whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man - for precisely the same reasons. - View Quote Details on For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed…