“See, there were these two guys in a lunatic asylum…and…

“See, there were these two guys in a lunatic asylum…and one night, one night they decide they don’t like living in an asylum any more. They decide they’re going to escape! So, like, they get up onto the roof and there, just across this narrow gap, they see the rooftops of the town, stretching away in the moonlight…stretching away to freedom. Now, the first guy, he jumps right across with no problem. But his friend, his friend daredn’t make the leap. Y’see…y’see, he’s afraid of falling. So then, the first guy has an idea…He says ‘Hey! I have my flashlight with me! I’ll shine it across the gap between the buildings. You can walk along the beam and join me!’ B-but the second guy just shakes his head. He suh-says… he says ‘What do you think I am? Crazy? You’d turn it off when I was half way across!’” - Batman: The Killing Joke

Villains, The Joker

Other Batman (comics) Quotes

“Hey…It’s going to be hard to learn a great many things about me, but one I’ll give you for free… I am no one’s son.” Batman: Under the Hood - View Quote Details on “Hey…It’s going to be hard to learn a great many…
“Ladies and Gentlemen! You’ve read about it in the papers! Now witness, before your very eyes, that most rare and tragic of nature’s mistakes! I give you: the average man. Physically unremarkable, it instead possesses a deformed set of values. Notice the hideously bloated sense of humanity’s importance. Also note the club-footed social conscience and the withered optimism. It’s certainly not for the squeamish, is it? Most repulsive of all, are its frail and useless notions of order and sanity. If too much weight is placed upon them… they snap. How does it live, I hear you ask? How does this poor pathetic specimen survive in today’s harsh and irrational environment? I’m afraid the sad answer is, “Not very well”. Faced with the inescapable fact that human existence is mad, random, and pointless, one in eight of them crack up and go stark slavering buggo! Who can blame them? In a world as psychotic as this… any other response would be crazy!” - Batman: The Killing Joke - View Quote Details on “Ladies and Gentlemen! You’ve read about it in the papers!…
Oh please, Batman. If you had the guts for that type of fun you would’ve done it years ago. I, on the other hand…” - “Return of The Joker - View Quote Details on Oh please, Batman. If you had the guts for that…
“I was brought here at gunpoint and in cuffs, Mr. Brusaw. I don’t think a hug is entirely the correct response here.” - Birds of Prey #69 - View Quote Details on “I was brought here at gunpoint and in cuffs, Mr…
“There’s no such thing as safe sex with some alien races. Think acid-for-blood. Think mate-then-kill.” - Harley Quinn #15 - View Quote Details on “There’s no such thing as safe sex with some alien…
“All men by nature seek knowledge.” - Batman: Hush - View Quote Details on “All men by nature seek knowledge.” - Batman: Hush
“I am a liar. No. We the acid scarred bitches of history of evil and hypocrisy exalt criminals to office. Vietnam, El Salvador, Chile with lovely missiles, roaring bombs of the rich and the white and the pious and burn children and torture women. Forever and ever, amen. God bless America.” - Arkham Asylum: A Serious House on Serious Earth - View Quote Details on “I am a liar. No. We the acid scarred bitches…
“When the chips are down, these “civilized” people, they’ll eat each other” - The Dark Knight - View Quote Details on “When the chips are down, these “civilized” people, they’ll eat…
I believe in Jim Gordon. I believe in Harvey Dent. I believe in Gotham City. - View Quote Details on I believe in Jim Gordon. I believe in Harvey Dent…
(to a music box with a ballerina figurine sharing a likeness to his wife) “I have failed you. I wish there were another way for me to say it. I only wish that you can hear me, somehow, someplace. Someplace where a warm hand waits for mine.” - Heart of Ice - View Quote Details on (to a music box with a ballerina figurine sharing a…