[showing Hitch his dance moves] Do the Q-tip! Q-tip! Now…

[showing Hitch his dance moves] Do the Q-tip! Q-tip! Now throw it away! Now what am I doing? I’m makin a pizza!

Albert

Other Hitch Quotes

Basic Principles - no woman wakes up saying “God, I hope I don’t get swept off my feet today!” Now, she might say “This is a really bad time for me,” or something like “I just need some space,” or my personal favorite “I’m really into my career right now.” You believe that? Neither does she. You know why? ‘Cause she’s lying to you, that’s why. You understand me? Lying! It’s not a bad time for her. She doesn’t need any space. And she may be into her career, but what she’s really saying is “Uh, get away from me now,” or possibly “Try harder, stupid,” but which one is it? 60% of all human communication is nonverbal body language; 30% is your tone, so that means 90% of what you’re saying ain’t coming out of your mouth. Of course she’s going to lie to you! She’s a nice person! She doesn’t want to hurt your feelings! What else she going to say? She doesn’t even know you… yet. Luckily, the fact is that just like the rest of us, even a beautiful woman doesn’t know what she wants until she sees it, and that’s where I come in. My job is to open her eyes. Basic Principles - no matter what, no matter when, no matter who… any man has a chance to sweep any woman off her feet; he just needs the right broom. - View Quote Details on Basic Principles - no woman wakes up saying “God, I…
[to Albert] One dance, one look, one kiss, that’s all we get, Albert. Just one shot, to make the difference between “happily ever after” and “Oh? He’s just some guy I went to some thing with once.” - View Quote Details on [to Albert] One dance, one look, one kiss, that’s all…
No guile, no game… No girl - View Quote Details on No guile, no game… No girl
Relationships are for people who are waiting for something better to come along. - View Quote Details on Relationships are for people who are waiting for something better…
[last lines] Basic principles - there are none. - View Quote Details on [last lines] Basic principles - there are none.
Give me a ring… sometime. [Laughs] I mean, on the phone. - View Quote Details on Give me a ring… sometime. [Laughs] I mean, on the…
You know what it’s like getting up every morning feeling hopeless? Feeling like the love of your life is waking up with the wrong man? But, at the same time hoping that she still finds happiness, even if it’s never going to be with you? - View Quote Details on You know what it’s like getting up every morning feeling…
I’m like a vault baby, locked down! - View Quote Details on I’m like a vault baby, locked down!
Never lie, steal, cheat, or drink. But if you must lie, lie in the arms of the one you love. If you must steal, steal away from bad company. If you must cheat, cheat death. And if you must drink, drink in the moments that take your breath away. - View Quote Details on Never lie, steal, cheat, or drink. But if you must…
You can’t stop it… [shouts] You cannot stop it… - View Quote Details on You can’t stop it… [shouts] You cannot stop it…