Shut up. I’ve been hanging out with Fighter all day…

Shut up. I’ve been hanging out with Fighter all day. I could literally feel him sucking away at my… brain-thinky score thing.

Light Warriors, Red Mage

Other 8-Bit Theater Quotes

(having been launched as a projectile) Target acquired. Squishing will be imminent. I wouldn’t mind it so much if the fall wasn’t just long enough for me to contemplate the ethical implications of being used as a weapon of mass destruction. - View Quote Details on (having been launched as a projectile) Target acquired. Squishing will…
By simply altering my other stats, I can channel their points into my intelligence score, thus making me phenomenally smart! - View Quote Details on By simply altering my other stats, I can channel their…
Just because I fly into a blind, homocidal rage at the drop of a helm doesn’t mean I’m incapable of appreciating the finer things in life. - View Quote Details on Just because I fly into a blind, homocidal rage at…
Vilbert Von Vampire: Ready?
Red Mage: I was born ready.
Fighter: I was born naked and screaming.
Black Mage: And if all goes according to plan, you’ll die like that too. - View Quote Details on Vilbert Von Vampire: Ready?
Red Mage: I was born ready.
Fighter: I…
Isn’t it ironic to yell the word silence? - View Quote Details on Isn’t it ironic to yell the word silence?
Fighter: Maybe we should level up a little before seeing the king so he knows we’re serious about this Light Warrior thing.
Red Mage: (Thinking) Level up to gain power or meet with the king to gain status and lord over newbies and impress girls… GHKKK!
*THUD*
Black Mage: Did he just faint?
Fighter: I thought I heard him say “Munchkin overload.”
Thief: I bet he probably fainted from exertion, what with carrying around these items that are heavy with um… value. I should liberate them. Er, for his own good of course. - View Quote Details on Fighter: Maybe we should level up a little before seeing…
Dragon: Blarg! I’m a dragon!
Group of twelve dragons: Or twelve!
Red Mage: Impossible! Only a maximum of nine enemies may be onscreen!
Dragon: Fuck you.
Red Mage (to other Light Warriors): RUN.
Note: This is the 1st instance in the entire comic that the word “fuck” is said without being censored or being split between panels as in. - View Quote Details on Dragon: Blarg! I’m a dragon!
Group of twelve dragons: Or twelve!
Red…
Black Mage: I see you guys have been recruiting nine other gentlemen into our midst. I wouldn’t mind their dancing or their prancing, but it’s making me very dizzy.
Red Mage: Uh, are you okay?
Black Mage: Oh yes. Peachy, I’d say. Someone should really answer that phone though. The incessant ringing is like some sort of… loud ringing that won’t, you know, go away.
Red Mage: I don’t hear any…
(Black Mage passes out.)
Red Mage: Oh, he’s dead.
Thief: No, just passed out.
(Red Mage unsheathes his sword.)
Red Mage: I am never wrong. - View Quote Details on Black Mage: I see you guys have been recruiting nine…
Red Mage: Trust me guys. This one is going down in the history books!
(3,000 years later)
Computer Teacher: Earth-children. Open your “History of the Most Fatally Horrible Plans and Other Painful Events” compu-books to the section on the carbon-unit “Red Mage”. End of line.
Mega Man: But there’s three full chapters devoted to this ‘Red Mage’.
Computer Teacher: Yes. Yes there are. This material will be on the digi-test.
Mega Man: Man, I hate the future! And it’s all Red Mage’s fault! - View Quote Details on Red Mage: Trust me guys. This one is going down…
Fighter: (After being pummelled by a giant) Kill me.
Black Mage: Tempting, but I need you for a human shield… I mean, travelling companion. Yeah. - View Quote Details on Fighter: (After being pummelled by a giant) Kill me.
Black Mage:…