The last time anybody made a list of the top…

The last time anybody made a list of the top hundred character attributes of New Yorkers, common sense snuck in at number 79. - c. 2

Mostly Harmless, Chapter 2

Other The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy Quotes

What to do if you find yourself stuck in a crack in the ground underneath a giant boulder you can’t move with no hope of rescue:
Consider how lucky you are that life has been good to you so far.
Alternatively, if life hasn’t been good to you so far (which, given your current circumstances, seems more likely):
Consider how lucky you are that it won’t be troubling you much longer. (Fit the Eighth) - View Quote Details on What to do if you find yourself stuck in a…
He pounded his steering wheel, kicked the floor, thumped his casette player until it suddenly started playing Barry Manilow, thumped it until it stopped again, and swore and swore and swore and swore and swore. -c. 9, Rob McKenna’s actions while testing his windshield wipers. - View Quote Details on He pounded his steering wheel, kicked the floor, thumped his…
“If I had two heads like you, Zaphod, I could have hours of fun banging them against a wall.” - The Hitchhiker’s Guide the Galaxy Radio Series. - View Quote Details on “If I had two heads like you, Zaphod, I could…
Curiously enough, the only thing that went through the mind of the bowl of petunias as it fell was Oh no, not again. - View Quote Details on Curiously enough, the only thing that went through the mind…
The regular early morning yell of horror was the sound of Arthur Dent waking up and suddenly remembering where he was. - View Quote Details on The regular early morning yell of horror was the sound…
I have detected,” he said, “disturbances in the wash.” [...]
“The wash?” said Arthur.
“The space-time wash,” said Ford. [...]
Arthur nodded, and then cleared his throat. “Are we talking about,” he asked cautiously, “some sort of Vogon laundromat, or what are we talking about?”
“Eddies,” said Ford, “in the space-time continuum.”
“Ah,” nodded Arthur, “is he? Is he?” He pushed his hands into the pocket of his dressing gown and looked knowledgeably into the distance.
“What?” said Ford.
“Er, who,” said Arthur, “is Eddy, then, exactly, then? - View Quote Details on "The...">I have detected,” he said, “disturbances in the wash.” [...]
“The…
He [Arthur] hoped and prayed that there wasn’t an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn’t an afterlife. - View Quote Details on He [Arthur] hoped and prayed that there wasn’t an afterlife…
“How can I tell,” said the man, “that the past isn’t a fiction designed to account for the discrepancy between my immediate physical sensations and my state of mind?” —The Ruler of the Universe - View Quote Details on “How can I tell,” said the man, “that the past…
Now it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anything so mindbogglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as a final and clinching proof of the non-existence of God. - View Quote Details on Now it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anything…
The story so far:
In the beginning the Universe was created.
This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move. - View Quote Details on The story so far:
In the beginning the Universe was created.
This…