Vargus: Fighter, you are easily my most accomplished student. Young Fighter:…

Vargus: Fighter, you are easily my most accomplished student.
Young Fighter: Yeah, I’m pretty awesome.
Vargus: There is but one more lesson for you here at Fighter’s Camp ‘86.
Young Fighter: Shoot.
Vargus: How many schools of zodiac kenshido are there?
Young Fighter: What, that’s it? You told us that on our first day at orientation. There’s twelve schools.
Vargus: How many, Fighter?
Young Fighter: Twelve, one school for each sign of the Zodiac. Given enough time and some hints, and I could even name them for ya.
Vargus: You have learned nothing. Go.
Young Fighter: But… I’ve got nowhere else to go!
Vargus: There is nothing for you here. Go.

Conversations, Episodes 301-400

Other 8-Bit Theater Quotes

Fighter: Oh yeah? Well then prepare for a steaming hot pile of action! TIGER’S FANG STRIKE!
Black Mage: Steaming pile?! - View Quote Details on Fighter: Oh yeah? Well then prepare for a steaming hot…
I know a guy. - View Quote Details on I know a guy.
Oh, man, what a smell in that thing. Horrible. Anyway! You guys ordered an Apocalypse, if I’m right. - View Quote Details on Oh, man, what a smell in that thing. Horrible. Anyway!…
Garland: Evil Princess Sara? I had the forest imp dream again. I’m scared.
Sara: In that case… go the hell away. - View Quote Details on Garland: Evil Princess Sara? I had the forest imp dream…
White Mage: Come on now, guys. Let’s settle this like adults.
Red Mage: Lie about your saving roll?
Thief: Steal from the elderly because they can’t fight back?
Black Mage: Blast a highly populated area into ashes, blame it on Fighter, and run like hell?
Fighter: I knew you were lying about that! I don’t even know any spells, Mage. How could I nuke that town?
White Mage:…I think I’m going to vote myself off. - View Quote Details on White Mage: Come on now, guys. Let’s settle this like…
Black Mage: Well, it’s about a thousand degrees below zero, we have no shelter, food, supplies of any kind, nor combustible materials that aren’t our flesh. I propose we cut open someone’s gut so the rest of us can sleep nestled within his warm entrails. The obvious choice for this sacrifice is Fighter because he is filled with meats.
Fighter: It’s true!
Red Mage: Wait, I have an idea! I have Ice spells! We’re saved!
Black Mage: Ice spells. Okay, Red Mage just volunteered.
Fighter: Aww… - View Quote Details on Black Mage: Well, it’s about a thousand degrees below zero,…
Fighter: Maybe we should level up a little before seeing the king so he knows we’re serious about this Light Warrior thing.
Red Mage: (Thinking) Level up to gain power or meet with the king to gain status and lord over newbies and impress girls… GHKKK!
*THUD*
Black Mage: Did he just faint?
Fighter: I thought I heard him say “Munchkin overload.”
Thief: I bet he probably fainted from exertion, what with carrying around these items that are heavy with um… value. I should liberate them. Er, for his own good of course. - View Quote Details on Fighter: Maybe we should level up a little before seeing…
I trust Black Mage ’cause he told me to. - View Quote Details on I trust Black Mage ’cause he told me to.
Thief: (after Black Mage stabs Fighter) I want to be surprised by that, but I can’t be.
Black Mage: It’s what he would have wanted… if he was me. - View Quote Details on Thief: (after Black Mage stabs Fighter) I want to be…
Sword-chucks, yo! - View Quote Details on Sword-chucks, yo!