White Mage: It’s a good thing I know my share…

White Mage: It’s a good thing I know my share of healing spells. Not to mention morals!
Black Mage: Hey! I know of them.

Conversations, Episodes 1-100

Other 8-Bit Theater Quotes

(on Vilbert) Well, he stopped reciting awful poetry, so you either pierced his gothicular membrane or his heart. - View Quote Details on (on Vilbert) Well, he stopped reciting awful poetry, so you…
Well, my dad was king, so now I’m king. But now that I think about it, genetics is not a very good system of determining executive power. Even the most capable and caring and beloved leader–much less my greedy, thieving father–can have an incompetent son so mindbogglingly stupid that he could singlehandedly flush the world’s greatest nation down the sewer before the populace at large has a chance to notice–which is exactly what the Cornerian Press used to say about me before I decreed that it was the civic duty of the press to never, ever question my rule, which I then also decreed to be absolute and perfect. So now even thinking that I’m not a perfect and benevolent ruler is crime. So now I can do crazy stuff like drill for Mana in Endangered Species Forest. Weee! - View Quote Details on Well, my dad was king, so now I’m king. But…
My dark soul burns with fiery agreement. Or possibly tacos. - View Quote Details on My dark soul burns with fiery agreement. Or possibly tacos.
Aye! They be like a thorny thorn in ye sidey side. - View Quote Details on Aye! They be like a thorny thorn in ye sidey…
No, Dad. I’m afraid that the curse you’re thinking of has a much more literal and much less metaphorical history attached to it. - View Quote Details on No, Dad. I’m afraid that the curse you’re thinking of…
Oh, Black Mage. You and your paranoid delusions. “These are Dark Warriors.” “White Mage likes me.” “Thief is trying to rob us of our very souls.” - View Quote Details on Oh, Black Mage. You and your paranoid delusions. “These are…
Fighter: (After being pummelled by a giant) Kill me.
Black Mage: Tempting, but I need you for a human shield… I mean, travelling companion. Yeah. - View Quote Details on Fighter: (After being pummelled by a giant) Kill me.
Black Mage:…
Well, I’ve grown a mustache. That’s two weeks down. Just 14 billion years to go. Wish I had a deck of cards. - View Quote Details on Well, I’ve grown a mustache. That’s two weeks down. Just…
(to Garland) What part of this whole villain thing do you not understand?! - View Quote Details on (to Garland) What part of this whole villain thing do…
Black Mage: Well, it’s about a thousand degrees below zero, we have no shelter, food, supplies of any kind, nor combustible materials that aren’t our flesh. I propose we cut open someone’s gut so the rest of us can sleep nestled within his warm entrails. The obvious choice for this sacrifice is Fighter because he is filled with meats.
Fighter: It’s true!
Red Mage: Wait, I have an idea! I have Ice spells! We’re saved!
Black Mage: Ice spells. Okay, Red Mage just volunteered.
Fighter: Aww… - View Quote Details on Black Mage: Well, it’s about a thousand degrees below zero,…