Mystery Men Quotes
- You must lash out with every limb, like the octopus who plays the drums. - View Quote Details on You must lash out with every limb, like the octopus…
- “You know, tooth decay and gingivitis can be a crime. That’s why I use Mighty Whitey toothpaste. Because I want my teeth to look — Amazing!” ~ Captain Amazing in TV commercial - View Quote Details on “You know, tooth decay and gingivitis can be a crime…
- We struck down evil with the mighty sword of teamwork and the hammer of not-bickering. - View Quote Details on We struck down evil with the mighty sword of teamwork…
- Do you wannna go back in the bag? Is that how we’re gonna play this? You make the rules. - View Quote Details on Do you wannna go back in the bag? Is that…
- [After avenging her father's murder] </br> “Now I’m going back to Graduate School. That was the agreement.” - View Quote Details on [After avenging her father's murder] </br> “Now I’m going back…
- People who don’t close their mouths when they chew make me… furious! - View Quote Details on People who don’t close their mouths when they chew make…
- “I’m the guy that gave your daddy the shaft!” ~ Tony P (to the Bowler) - View Quote Details on “I’m the guy that gave your daddy the shaft!” ~…
- I will keep dreaming! I will keep dreaming, my friend! And when I wake up you better hope, you better hope you’re… asleep! - View Quote Details on I will keep dreaming! I will keep dreaming, my friend!…
- “P.M.S. Avenger. I only work four days a month. Is there a problem with that?” ~ P.M.S. Avenger - View Quote Details on “P.M.S. Avenger. I only work four days a month. Is…
- “Okay, okay — the Six Very Nearly Dead Guys With a Temporary Reprieve. That’s it! That’s your name!” ~ Tony P - View Quote Details on “Okay, okay — the Six Very Nearly Dead Guys With…
- It all started when I was just thirteen years of age. One day while walking with some friends I accidentally cut the cheese. Well, in my adolescent awkwardness, I blamed it on an old gypsy woman who happened to be passing by. Big mistake! The gypsy woman placed a curse upon my head. Because I had smelt it, she decreed that I would forevermore be… he who dealt it! - View Quote Details on It all started when I was just thirteen years of…
- “No, no. I don’t live here. I’m just here for the ladies.” (at a nursing home) - View Quote Details on “No, no. I don’t live here. I’m just here for…
- There’s no use waiting for the cavalry, because as of this moment, the cavalry is us. - View Quote Details on There’s no use waiting for the cavalry, because as of…
- Lucille, God gave me a gift. I shovel well. I shovel very well. - View Quote Details on Lucille, God gave me a gift. I shovel well. I…
- It’s the FUNKYSKUNKULATOR! - View Quote Details on It’s the FUNKYSKUNKULATOR!
- “Flip the switch, lady. Don’t stare at me, lift your left arm and flip it, you moron! You’re a MORON! You’re a MORON!” ~ Captain Amazing - View Quote Details on “Flip the switch, lady. Don’t stare at me, lift your…
- “His name’s Mr. Furious, and his power comes from his boundless rage.” ~ Monica - View Quote Details on “His name’s Mr. Furious, and his power comes from his…
- Why are you guys always dissing me? I’m a superhero too, you know! I have powers. - View Quote Details on Why are you guys always dissing me? I’m a superhero…
- You guys just be sure to jump in when the action starts. You do your share, we’ll keep you around. - View Quote Details on You guys just be sure to jump in when the…
- Who would want to rent a chicken? - View Quote Details on Who would want to rent a chicken?
- “Baby, you shovel better than any man I’ve ever known… but that does not make you a superhero. You’re a good husband, and a good father. Nothing more.” ~ Lucille (Mrs. Shoveler) - View Quote Details on “Baby, you shovel better than any man I’ve ever known…
- All my life I’ve been ignored by people, and finally, after years of being overlooked, I found I have the power to disappear. - View Quote Details on All my life I’ve been ignored by people, and finally,…
- He is rather ripping, isn’t he? With the spinning and the hurting and the kicking… - View Quote Details on He is rather ripping, isn’t he? With the spinning and…
- It’s cool, isn’t it? It goes right up to the point of being, like, confusing. - View Quote Details on It’s cool, isn’t it? It goes right up to the…
- We’re all in over our heads and we know it. But if we take on this fight, those of us who survive it will forever after show our scars with pride and say, ‘That’s right! I was there! I fought the good fight!’ - View Quote Details on We’re all in over our heads and we know it…
- “WAFFLE MAAAAN! Yeah, I’m the Waffler! Golden Crispy! Bad guys ar history! YEEEAAAH!” ~The Waffler - View Quote Details on “WAFFLE MAAAAN! Yeah, I’m the Waffler! Golden Crispy! Bad guys…
- The point is, your boy’s a Limey fork-flinger, mother. Hard cheese to swallow, I know, but there it is. - View Quote Details on The point is, your boy’s a Limey fork-flinger, mother. Hard…
- (creepy, ominous dude at tryouts) “I…am BALLERINA MAN!” ~Ballerina Man - View Quote Details on (creepy, ominous dude at tryouts) “I…am BALLERINA MAN!” ~Ballerina Man
- I am transparent. I am like the window. I am see-through. I’m like Saran Wrap. - View Quote Details on I am transparent. I am like the window. I am…
- He who questions training only trains himself at asking questions. - View Quote Details on He who questions training only trains himself at asking questions.
- “It is so easy to get the better of people when they care about each other — which is why evil will always have the edge. - View Quote Details on “It is so easy to get the better of people…
- Do you think there’s a really angry way I could say I’m sorry? - View Quote Details on Do you think there’s a really angry way I could…
- “Just… be… Roy. Okay?” ~ Monica - View Quote Details on “Just… be… Roy. Okay?” ~ Monica
- Here comes Daddy! - View Quote Details on Here comes Daddy!
- I guess I’ll just have to take my ball and go home. - View Quote Details on I guess I’ll just have to take my ball and…
- But, seeing as it is your first night I shall FORKgive you if you FORKget. - View Quote Details on But, seeing as it is your first night I shall…
- How delightfully eccentric — while simultaneously being a complete waste of our time! - View Quote Details on How delightfully eccentric — while simultaneously being a complete waste…
- We’ve got a blind date with Destiny. And it looks like she’s ordered the lobster. - View Quote Details on We’ve got a blind date with Destiny. And it looks…
- Do yourself a favor and don’t punch my clock ’cause I’m a Pantera’s box you do not wanna open! - View Quote Details on Do yourself a favor and don’t punch my clock ’cause…
- You must be like the wolf pack… not like the six-pack. - View Quote Details on You must be like the wolf pack… not like the…
- Now, there’s a wedgie she won’t soon forget. - View Quote Details on Now, there’s a wedgie she won’t soon forget.
- See, that’s why, in general, a mad scientist is less desirable than a garden-variety scientist. - View Quote Details on See, that’s why, in general, a mad scientist is less…
- It’s a psycho-frakulator! It creates a-a cloud of radically fluctuating deviant chaotrons, which penetrate the synaptic relays. It’s concantenated with a-a synchronous transport switch that creates a virtual tributary! It’s focused onto a biobolic reflector and what happens is, is that hallucinations become reality… and the brain is literally fried from within. - View Quote Details on It’s a psycho-frakulator! It creates a-a cloud of radically fluctuating…
- Allow me to introduce myself: the Blue Raja, Master of Silverware. Forks a speciality. - View Quote Details on Allow me to introduce myself: the Blue Raja, Master of…
- Sweet dreams, lilac. - View Quote Details on Sweet dreams, lilac.
- Okay, let’s all be little automaton droids and believe everything we hear on TV. - View Quote Details on Okay, let’s all be little automaton droids and believe everything…
- Well, well, well — if it isn’t our old friends the Red-Eyes. Good evening, gentlemen. We weren’t expecting to see you again so…spoon! - View Quote Details on Well, well, well — if it isn’t our old friends…
- “I believe in you, Daddy.” ~ Roland (Shoveler’s son) - View Quote Details on “I believe in you, Daddy.” ~ Roland (Shoveler’s son)
- “This contraption is, in fact, a weapon of mass destruction. Casanova plans to turn it against the city at midnight.” ~ Captain Amazing - View Quote Details on “This contraption is, in fact, a weapon of mass destruction…
- Tonight I am going to do to Champion City what I have done to its greatest superhero — und there will still be time to go up, get down… und boogie! - View Quote Details on Tonight I am going to do to Champion City what…
- We are number one! All others are number two, or lower. - View Quote Details on We are number one! All others are number two, or…
About Mystery Men
This 1999 film is a comedic twist on comic book superheroes. When Champion City’s greatest superhero disappears, the fight against evil is left in the hands of a group of second-string superhero “wannabees’. Directed by Kinka Usher. Written by Neil Cuthbert. Based on characters created by Bob Burden.
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